Post by grasshop on Jul 16, 2006 19:48:27 GMT -5
My second stab at SR fanfiction, since you guys thought my other one was well...creepy. I hope I don't creep you guys out on this one. I am more shooting for drama/angst/romance sort of thing. Also, it's a tragedy tear-jerker depending on the audience so yah...
I also wrote this while basically asleep, so much that when I woke up I had no idea that I had written it and read it over again lol Funny, huh? Strange what ppl can do when in the subconscious parts of their mind. I guess this is what I was dreaming? *shrugs* Explains the many 'jumps' in the story yah...
Akune's in this one so I must've been trying to please Akune (the member) here lol. It seems I always try to do that now hehe She's the best by the way GO AKUNE!!! *hugs*
For you guys to know, Grasshop is wounded in battle in this one, and not commiting suicide (he just doesn't seem the type to do that.) I'm taking a twist on why he's so ridiculed, maybe the way he likes to put himself up and vain and stuffs. Basicaly he's dying and breaking down in this one, and his life flashes before his eyes. Strange what the moments before death can do for a person...I hope you guys enjoy, and don't cry (or maybe laugh?) too much lol
HERE WE GO!!!!
---------------------------------
“…ugnnn……” The insect spat out a spray of blood, spattering himself with it…Some trickled down his front side as he gripped his stomach. The gash has cut deep, too deep. A swirl of black dizzied his eyes and he felt himself start to fall. A white bolt of searing pain shot through his thin body and he cried out hoarsely, his high pitched voice sounding hollow for once. In his head, a movie played endlessly for what seemed like hours. It tortured him, even more so than the actual physical pain. The Invectid warrior was on his knees, eyes blank but seemingly staring at the ground.
“Mommy…where did you go?” He had shaken her a million times, but she wouldn’t respond, the life snuffed from her. The young Invectid was far too young to understand. His tiny fingers played along the plated arms, pushing and letting go, pushing and letting go. His huge, yellowed eyes had remained fixated on the image. Her eyes were open, clearly, but no seeing light was coming out. “Mommy… where are you?”
His wound began to pour streams of blood, and he was all at once aware of the smell. That metallic smell. She had smelled like that… He grimaced, closing his eyes for a brief moment and opening them again. His heart and breathing slowed considerably and for a moment he almost fainted. There were the voices…they were laughing at him. He HATED being laughed at…It was a horrible thing.
The young insect had hung his head low. His arms and legs ached from the beating. This time he had done something really terrible. He had snuck out to play with another young insect…a female.
“Daddy will catch me…” He was unsure. For a moment, he pondered whether or not he should take the offer the young girl handed out. There was a secret place she had longed to show him. She even touched his hand…The only touches he usually ever received were harsh ones that stung and burned. Those were the kind that made him cry, but for some reason, this one had made him want to cry even more. He could feel the tears threatening to spill.
A tear slid down the wounded warrior’s cheek, and there was a laughter that was wrong and bad.
He had gone with the girl, and Daddy had caught him coming back home. His antennae were clipped, his face was pummeled with large fists, his legs were bitten, his back was lashed with thorn. The Invectid remembered the pain and this brought the tears. Laughter. It was Daddy’s laughter. “Never gonna be anything good anyways. Piece of garbage. You always end up screwing things up. Piece of…”
For a moment he forgot his name. Was it trash? Was it loser? Was it any of the other horrible names he had received through the years? No…no, Grasshop. His name was Grasshop and just that. He trembled, his body touching ground as he fell on his side. Blood had begun to form a pool around his lanky form. His fingers clenched, unclenched. ‘I can’t reach that, Daddy. Please, don’t be mad at me…I didn’t mean to break it…I just wanted to fix it better...all better…’ A retching sound erupted from him and he spewed vomit and crimson. He didn’t notice the taste. He believed it to be…
The girl smiled, “It’s called herbal tea. I made it from the big leaves outside.”
The drink had tasted good, bitter and sweet all at the same time. The insect girl had a nice laugh. She laughed, but it was not the ridiculing, evil laugh of the others. This one made him want to cry with relief…
Then her head appeared, crushed, bits of brain clinging to the unseeing eyes. Grasshop writhed madly on the ground now, sickly trying to expel the image. His tongue lolled out of his mouth, wet with blood. His clothes were torn, too…so torn…’Put em back on. No, don’t take ‘em off, I want them!!!!’ His hands flew to his cape, pulling it down over his body tightly. His heart was thumping wildly…his head seemed to explode with the feelings. A surge of energy crept up his thighs and he pumped the lower half of his body in the air. “STOP IT, NOOOW!” He screamed, unawares of the eyes watching him. His world now was a black one.
“Hey, stop! That’s making me funny!” His small voice had pleaded with the huge insect-like creature. There was no where to go. He had run and run until his lungs were about burst. Daddy had meant to kill him tonight…make him not see. Make him still…and now he was in more trouble. Here this thing was… what was it doing. A small cry wheezed out of him as it touched him. It hurt badly. His legs had shook like an earthquake. “HELP ME!” Nobody had answered. A few passed by and laughed, pointing. Why why why?
His eyes rolled back into his head, muscles in his throat straining. His neck creaked, his legs stiffened as he moaned. His body was decorated in crimson patterns where he had rolled around in his own life fluids. Why wouldn’t anyone help? Couldn’t they see he was dying? Grasshop flopped on the ground helplessly, arms and legs flailing wildly. He was a sight to behold even as the life seeped from him. His breaths were hard to get out. Black still whirled in him. He tried to get rid of it, but it had already made it’s home in the pits of his stomach.
There was no food. He was too thin, and growing thinner. His antennae wouldn’t stand up any more, instead laying almost completely flat as he tried to move forward, weakly. His legs had no strength… He was older now, and more than aware enough to realize that nobody cared, and that nobody ever would. Grasshop’s face was sunken in, eyes void of light, just as in death…but he still lived. The good man had come to rescue him. Mantid had taken him under his wing and trained him in what he loved to do best, which was toying with machinery.
Life was still not pleasant. The laughs were still hanging in the air, and the punishments were harsh. Stags, another Invectid, had hit him. “Stop Daddy…” Stags was a lot bigger than Grasshop, and his punches like electric shocks to his vulnerable body. “Stupid coward, stop running, you gay loser.”
The Invectid cried fully now, tears coming from him. “I’m not. I’m not that.” He wailed…broken. His fingers dug into the dirt, drawing lines deep into the earth. “Please don’t call me that.”
Of course he had never said anything. The scars were too deep. He sat in his room, eyes out the window, at the cruel world. ‘What am I and why am I here?’ He had wept much that night, for himself, for everything he tried to be and couldn’t be. He was not a person. He didn’t have opinions. He didn’t have a soul. Grasshop had stared at his hands for a long time. “What am I then…why can it hurt if I am just a something and not a someone.” He had bitten his pillow hard in frustration, and the sheets too, in his mouth, grinding. The hurt inside was too much.
“But I am a person. But I am.” He repeated this now, thrashing calmed now, body barely rolling. He was cold, and this he was aware of, but he swore that the dead breeze was coming from the open window. ‘I have to shut that window…’
The rain had come and soaked him through the window. He realized he had gone to sleep in tears. His body and his mind were weary. Sleep wanted to close his eyes again, but even when he shut it out with darkness, there was still nothing but painful emptiness. He couldn’t shut the window. He had to go to sleep… ‘Never wake up.’ It was a prayer he said to himself every night. If the others found out, they would laugh again, and maybe hit him again.
The next months had been tiresome….he had tried to perfect everything, but he couldn’t concentrate with everyone bothering him. He messed up every time, and got a punishment…then the window would stay open and it was a vicious cycle. He wanted it to stop and get out…a life…perhaps someone to feel a warmth for.
Grasshop shivered on the ground. The blood had dried on him, caking his clothes and pinning them to his form. A bubble of blood burst from his mouth. It seemed like a kiss to him…
‘I want someone to kiss me like that.’ He had thought as he peered out of his window again, in full view of Buguese having a meeting with Beerain. Watching them made the hurt disappear at the time, but eventually grow into a monster…. Beerain would lick Buguese’s lips slowly, and he would watch this. That feeling would come back, back when the big insect had him…but he would repress it now, though it didn’t seem to be so bad this time…not like then. This time there was no pain or hot or big earthquake shaking. It was more of a warm thing, like gentle hands holding him. Beerain would pull the right hand man of Mantid closer and embrace him in the dim lighting. Once Grasshop had wept at this, but he didn’t understand why.
The dying Grasshop blinked a few times, watching the couple all over again, and he outstretched his arms in the air, one mangled, missing the tip of one of the fingers. Blood poured between the digits, down his scrawny arms. His voice cracked, squeaking out the words, “Now hold me please. I want someone to hold me, please. Please touch me like that.” He became frantic again, arms trembling as he begged the air. His body screamed for a gentle touch…anything…anything but the hits and the smiles and jeers.
His mother had held him once…. ‘But Daddy won’t let her any more. I’m all wrong.’ He had slept in a corner without a bed, because he was not made for beds. He was actually made for outside, but Mommy had insisted he sleep inside. Daddy had agreed but only for him to sleep in the corner. The wall was white and cold and hard, and he really didn’t sleep much. Mantid’s beds were warmer and soft and he could finally rest.
“You idiot!” Glass was broken, he was cut. He was bleeding and drowning in the dark blood. It filled his mouth and eyes and ears and made his arms cry out with torment. He wanted Mommy’s bed, he wanted it badly. Mommy became still for it. He had caused it. Grasshop was why Mommy wasn’t there, and Grasshop was why Grasshop was wrong. He was an accident, a mistake. Mistakes aren’t people… He badly wanted to be held now, his body aching, please…I need to rest…I’m so tired….
He screamed now, “HOLD ME LOVE ME PLEASE! I AM A PERSON! I’LL NEVER BE BAD AGAIN, NOT LIKE THAT DON’T TOUCH ME BAAAAAD!!!!” Blood seeped from the reopened gashes. His figure thrashed weakly. “I love…I love…” Breaths softened, became little puffs of air. His arms fell limply at his sides, his legs stilled. His eyes lost more fire. “Idiot…I’m an idiot…Not person…” He said it as if in a state of realization, and then the touch came.
Someone lifted him from the ground, and he could feel skin against his outer shell. It was warm and pulsing and …alive. He coughed and blood dribbled form the expressionless mouth. His hand shakily reached for a vision…he wanted to touch this person who had lifted him. He found a face, soft featured, short hair. Aqune. Of course…He wanted to see her at once, but his eyesight failed him, seeing only her imagined image in his head.
Aqune pulled Grasshop’s limp body closer to hers, feeling what was left of him. Not much…her face turned grim as she stared at the limp body, the tattered clothing, the marred shell, the sticky fluid… Her heart was torn in pieces. She had been rendered motionless by his words. They were so simple, yet so powerful…She had really not been one to criticize the poor warrior. Slowly she cradled him, as a mother would do, humming softly. ‘I was seconds too late…’ She thought, caught in her deep inner thoughts as she looked at his face. It remained emotionless.
But he was still living…she touched his blood-stained chest and felt his heartbeat, faint but existing. Slowly she brought her fingers to her eyes, seeing that she had gotten crimson on her fingers. Bringing them to her lips now, she kissed them and placed her hand on his cheek. He barely winced…
After a moment he finally spoke, his voice small and barely above a whisper, “Mommy…found you…so happy to see you Mommy…hold me….I am a person.” Aqune smiled sadly at this and cuddled his form closer to hers.
“Yes, Grasshop…you are.” She whispered next to his cheek and kissed it tenderly. His hand was on her face now, his eyes seeing his mother and not the Invectid Spider Rider. He breathed, “Love.”
She hesitated, then whispered back, “I love you too, Grasshop.” A tear came on his face, but she quickly kissed it away. “No more tears…you are found. You are a person now.”
Grasshop trembled, and felt the light kiss on his lips. His heartbeat quieted at this, and he sighed, his last breath. A cold wind came to carry him out, and Aqune was there, her mouth pressed against his, his beaten body cradled in her arms. She would hold him until the kiss lost its magic. She would hold him until she knew there was nothing left. She would hold him until her own heart ceased to sound. She would… She would… She would……
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Well, what did you guys think? Please r&r. I love comments, good and bad alike. Hope I impressed you this time Akune!!! Maybe it won't be creepy if Akune's in it? XXXDDD Waiting for comments *twiddles thumbs and whistles* ;D
I also wrote this while basically asleep, so much that when I woke up I had no idea that I had written it and read it over again lol Funny, huh? Strange what ppl can do when in the subconscious parts of their mind. I guess this is what I was dreaming? *shrugs* Explains the many 'jumps' in the story yah...
Akune's in this one so I must've been trying to please Akune (the member) here lol. It seems I always try to do that now hehe She's the best by the way GO AKUNE!!! *hugs*
For you guys to know, Grasshop is wounded in battle in this one, and not commiting suicide (he just doesn't seem the type to do that.) I'm taking a twist on why he's so ridiculed, maybe the way he likes to put himself up and vain and stuffs. Basicaly he's dying and breaking down in this one, and his life flashes before his eyes. Strange what the moments before death can do for a person...I hope you guys enjoy, and don't cry (or maybe laugh?) too much lol
HERE WE GO!!!!
---------------------------------
“…ugnnn……” The insect spat out a spray of blood, spattering himself with it…Some trickled down his front side as he gripped his stomach. The gash has cut deep, too deep. A swirl of black dizzied his eyes and he felt himself start to fall. A white bolt of searing pain shot through his thin body and he cried out hoarsely, his high pitched voice sounding hollow for once. In his head, a movie played endlessly for what seemed like hours. It tortured him, even more so than the actual physical pain. The Invectid warrior was on his knees, eyes blank but seemingly staring at the ground.
“Mommy…where did you go?” He had shaken her a million times, but she wouldn’t respond, the life snuffed from her. The young Invectid was far too young to understand. His tiny fingers played along the plated arms, pushing and letting go, pushing and letting go. His huge, yellowed eyes had remained fixated on the image. Her eyes were open, clearly, but no seeing light was coming out. “Mommy… where are you?”
His wound began to pour streams of blood, and he was all at once aware of the smell. That metallic smell. She had smelled like that… He grimaced, closing his eyes for a brief moment and opening them again. His heart and breathing slowed considerably and for a moment he almost fainted. There were the voices…they were laughing at him. He HATED being laughed at…It was a horrible thing.
The young insect had hung his head low. His arms and legs ached from the beating. This time he had done something really terrible. He had snuck out to play with another young insect…a female.
“Daddy will catch me…” He was unsure. For a moment, he pondered whether or not he should take the offer the young girl handed out. There was a secret place she had longed to show him. She even touched his hand…The only touches he usually ever received were harsh ones that stung and burned. Those were the kind that made him cry, but for some reason, this one had made him want to cry even more. He could feel the tears threatening to spill.
A tear slid down the wounded warrior’s cheek, and there was a laughter that was wrong and bad.
He had gone with the girl, and Daddy had caught him coming back home. His antennae were clipped, his face was pummeled with large fists, his legs were bitten, his back was lashed with thorn. The Invectid remembered the pain and this brought the tears. Laughter. It was Daddy’s laughter. “Never gonna be anything good anyways. Piece of garbage. You always end up screwing things up. Piece of…”
For a moment he forgot his name. Was it trash? Was it loser? Was it any of the other horrible names he had received through the years? No…no, Grasshop. His name was Grasshop and just that. He trembled, his body touching ground as he fell on his side. Blood had begun to form a pool around his lanky form. His fingers clenched, unclenched. ‘I can’t reach that, Daddy. Please, don’t be mad at me…I didn’t mean to break it…I just wanted to fix it better...all better…’ A retching sound erupted from him and he spewed vomit and crimson. He didn’t notice the taste. He believed it to be…
The girl smiled, “It’s called herbal tea. I made it from the big leaves outside.”
The drink had tasted good, bitter and sweet all at the same time. The insect girl had a nice laugh. She laughed, but it was not the ridiculing, evil laugh of the others. This one made him want to cry with relief…
Then her head appeared, crushed, bits of brain clinging to the unseeing eyes. Grasshop writhed madly on the ground now, sickly trying to expel the image. His tongue lolled out of his mouth, wet with blood. His clothes were torn, too…so torn…’Put em back on. No, don’t take ‘em off, I want them!!!!’ His hands flew to his cape, pulling it down over his body tightly. His heart was thumping wildly…his head seemed to explode with the feelings. A surge of energy crept up his thighs and he pumped the lower half of his body in the air. “STOP IT, NOOOW!” He screamed, unawares of the eyes watching him. His world now was a black one.
“Hey, stop! That’s making me funny!” His small voice had pleaded with the huge insect-like creature. There was no where to go. He had run and run until his lungs were about burst. Daddy had meant to kill him tonight…make him not see. Make him still…and now he was in more trouble. Here this thing was… what was it doing. A small cry wheezed out of him as it touched him. It hurt badly. His legs had shook like an earthquake. “HELP ME!” Nobody had answered. A few passed by and laughed, pointing. Why why why?
His eyes rolled back into his head, muscles in his throat straining. His neck creaked, his legs stiffened as he moaned. His body was decorated in crimson patterns where he had rolled around in his own life fluids. Why wouldn’t anyone help? Couldn’t they see he was dying? Grasshop flopped on the ground helplessly, arms and legs flailing wildly. He was a sight to behold even as the life seeped from him. His breaths were hard to get out. Black still whirled in him. He tried to get rid of it, but it had already made it’s home in the pits of his stomach.
There was no food. He was too thin, and growing thinner. His antennae wouldn’t stand up any more, instead laying almost completely flat as he tried to move forward, weakly. His legs had no strength… He was older now, and more than aware enough to realize that nobody cared, and that nobody ever would. Grasshop’s face was sunken in, eyes void of light, just as in death…but he still lived. The good man had come to rescue him. Mantid had taken him under his wing and trained him in what he loved to do best, which was toying with machinery.
Life was still not pleasant. The laughs were still hanging in the air, and the punishments were harsh. Stags, another Invectid, had hit him. “Stop Daddy…” Stags was a lot bigger than Grasshop, and his punches like electric shocks to his vulnerable body. “Stupid coward, stop running, you gay loser.”
The Invectid cried fully now, tears coming from him. “I’m not. I’m not that.” He wailed…broken. His fingers dug into the dirt, drawing lines deep into the earth. “Please don’t call me that.”
Of course he had never said anything. The scars were too deep. He sat in his room, eyes out the window, at the cruel world. ‘What am I and why am I here?’ He had wept much that night, for himself, for everything he tried to be and couldn’t be. He was not a person. He didn’t have opinions. He didn’t have a soul. Grasshop had stared at his hands for a long time. “What am I then…why can it hurt if I am just a something and not a someone.” He had bitten his pillow hard in frustration, and the sheets too, in his mouth, grinding. The hurt inside was too much.
“But I am a person. But I am.” He repeated this now, thrashing calmed now, body barely rolling. He was cold, and this he was aware of, but he swore that the dead breeze was coming from the open window. ‘I have to shut that window…’
The rain had come and soaked him through the window. He realized he had gone to sleep in tears. His body and his mind were weary. Sleep wanted to close his eyes again, but even when he shut it out with darkness, there was still nothing but painful emptiness. He couldn’t shut the window. He had to go to sleep… ‘Never wake up.’ It was a prayer he said to himself every night. If the others found out, they would laugh again, and maybe hit him again.
The next months had been tiresome….he had tried to perfect everything, but he couldn’t concentrate with everyone bothering him. He messed up every time, and got a punishment…then the window would stay open and it was a vicious cycle. He wanted it to stop and get out…a life…perhaps someone to feel a warmth for.
Grasshop shivered on the ground. The blood had dried on him, caking his clothes and pinning them to his form. A bubble of blood burst from his mouth. It seemed like a kiss to him…
‘I want someone to kiss me like that.’ He had thought as he peered out of his window again, in full view of Buguese having a meeting with Beerain. Watching them made the hurt disappear at the time, but eventually grow into a monster…. Beerain would lick Buguese’s lips slowly, and he would watch this. That feeling would come back, back when the big insect had him…but he would repress it now, though it didn’t seem to be so bad this time…not like then. This time there was no pain or hot or big earthquake shaking. It was more of a warm thing, like gentle hands holding him. Beerain would pull the right hand man of Mantid closer and embrace him in the dim lighting. Once Grasshop had wept at this, but he didn’t understand why.
The dying Grasshop blinked a few times, watching the couple all over again, and he outstretched his arms in the air, one mangled, missing the tip of one of the fingers. Blood poured between the digits, down his scrawny arms. His voice cracked, squeaking out the words, “Now hold me please. I want someone to hold me, please. Please touch me like that.” He became frantic again, arms trembling as he begged the air. His body screamed for a gentle touch…anything…anything but the hits and the smiles and jeers.
His mother had held him once…. ‘But Daddy won’t let her any more. I’m all wrong.’ He had slept in a corner without a bed, because he was not made for beds. He was actually made for outside, but Mommy had insisted he sleep inside. Daddy had agreed but only for him to sleep in the corner. The wall was white and cold and hard, and he really didn’t sleep much. Mantid’s beds were warmer and soft and he could finally rest.
“You idiot!” Glass was broken, he was cut. He was bleeding and drowning in the dark blood. It filled his mouth and eyes and ears and made his arms cry out with torment. He wanted Mommy’s bed, he wanted it badly. Mommy became still for it. He had caused it. Grasshop was why Mommy wasn’t there, and Grasshop was why Grasshop was wrong. He was an accident, a mistake. Mistakes aren’t people… He badly wanted to be held now, his body aching, please…I need to rest…I’m so tired….
He screamed now, “HOLD ME LOVE ME PLEASE! I AM A PERSON! I’LL NEVER BE BAD AGAIN, NOT LIKE THAT DON’T TOUCH ME BAAAAAD!!!!” Blood seeped from the reopened gashes. His figure thrashed weakly. “I love…I love…” Breaths softened, became little puffs of air. His arms fell limply at his sides, his legs stilled. His eyes lost more fire. “Idiot…I’m an idiot…Not person…” He said it as if in a state of realization, and then the touch came.
Someone lifted him from the ground, and he could feel skin against his outer shell. It was warm and pulsing and …alive. He coughed and blood dribbled form the expressionless mouth. His hand shakily reached for a vision…he wanted to touch this person who had lifted him. He found a face, soft featured, short hair. Aqune. Of course…He wanted to see her at once, but his eyesight failed him, seeing only her imagined image in his head.
Aqune pulled Grasshop’s limp body closer to hers, feeling what was left of him. Not much…her face turned grim as she stared at the limp body, the tattered clothing, the marred shell, the sticky fluid… Her heart was torn in pieces. She had been rendered motionless by his words. They were so simple, yet so powerful…She had really not been one to criticize the poor warrior. Slowly she cradled him, as a mother would do, humming softly. ‘I was seconds too late…’ She thought, caught in her deep inner thoughts as she looked at his face. It remained emotionless.
But he was still living…she touched his blood-stained chest and felt his heartbeat, faint but existing. Slowly she brought her fingers to her eyes, seeing that she had gotten crimson on her fingers. Bringing them to her lips now, she kissed them and placed her hand on his cheek. He barely winced…
After a moment he finally spoke, his voice small and barely above a whisper, “Mommy…found you…so happy to see you Mommy…hold me….I am a person.” Aqune smiled sadly at this and cuddled his form closer to hers.
“Yes, Grasshop…you are.” She whispered next to his cheek and kissed it tenderly. His hand was on her face now, his eyes seeing his mother and not the Invectid Spider Rider. He breathed, “Love.”
She hesitated, then whispered back, “I love you too, Grasshop.” A tear came on his face, but she quickly kissed it away. “No more tears…you are found. You are a person now.”
Grasshop trembled, and felt the light kiss on his lips. His heartbeat quieted at this, and he sighed, his last breath. A cold wind came to carry him out, and Aqune was there, her mouth pressed against his, his beaten body cradled in her arms. She would hold him until the kiss lost its magic. She would hold him until she knew there was nothing left. She would hold him until her own heart ceased to sound. She would… She would… She would……
---------------------------
Well, what did you guys think? Please r&r. I love comments, good and bad alike. Hope I impressed you this time Akune!!! Maybe it won't be creepy if Akune's in it? XXXDDD Waiting for comments *twiddles thumbs and whistles* ;D
